Thursday, March 27, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
This is a closeup of her Easter wreath. J is an older woman who plays many roles in my life, although I've known her less than a year. (I remember her roses being in bloom when I first walked up her garden path.) She performs the roles of mother, grandmother, sister, confidant, child (yes, she's entitled to her "needy" moments), rock (as in source of strength), and comforter. I did not expect her last-minute Easter invitation, but The Child and I had no plans, really- I was just going to take him to an indoor waterpark on the other side of town. I hadn't been sure what we'd do about Easter dinner, but The Child cares little of cuisine so I wasn't overly concerned.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Maybe, if it does happen, I will finally write about what it is that I do for a living. But until then, I intend to stick with my original blogging intent: to attempt to forge an identity which does not include my job title.
My sister's cancer surgery has been cancelled due to the unexpectedly rapid growth of the tumor on her tongue. Removal of the tumor at this point would apparently require the removal of too much tongue tissue. So they've installed a chemo port in her tongue and yesterday she was in Dana Farber in Boston receiving various types of infusions of toxic medicine for 16 hours. All I can say is, I hope she believes in conventional medicine a lot more than I do. Faith is everything.
And I believe in spring. Here it is, as evidenced in this photo taken yesterday. (I didn't intend to memorialize the garden hose, but I didn't notice it until now.)
This bold bellwether was the first to bloom. Actually a crocus, it serves to remind me of the rampant buttercups of my youth, as well as the soon-to-appear daffodils which will forever remind me of my dear friend W who died with the daffodils 4 years ago in April.
Friday, March 14, 2008
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
There are a few other things, though. My sister, who lives 800 miles away, has been diagnosed with cancer for which she is facing a 10-hour surgery next week. Being a single parent, travelling to Boston to help her is highly impractical, so I'm standing by, waiting.
I am still being sued by The Child's father for full custody and child support (even though he has never paid me a dime of child support!), and I am facing 2 dreaded court dates in May. This court case has been going on for a year, so I ought to be used to it by now. I'm not.
Then there's my job. The organization to which I have dedicated my life and labor since college is likely to shut down on April Fool's Day. I've always read that men derive their identity from their jobs, but I can state with absolute certainty that there are women thus afflicted. The field I'm in is notorious for job scarcity, and there are no more opportunities where I live. Because of my above-mentioned court case, I am obligated to remain in this city.
The above-pictured house is financed by a 15-year mortgage, which means the monthly payments are sky-high. Working at Wal-Mart will not cover my mortgage.
Then there's The Car. I am the proud owner of a 1991 Honda Civic. You know, they say that those little Civics are not good bets in crashes, but The Child and I have always been 100% safe in that car. The Car broke down once, only once, and that was last summer in the parking lot of the Rose Garden where I was dumping recycling. My house is situated on the same Rose Garden, so I had to walk but a few yards to get home, where I waited in air-conditioned comfort for the tow truck.
The Car is in the shop today. The Car always knows when it's convenient to show that it needs attention. I don't have to go to work today, and The Car's key began struggling to turn the ignition switch yesterday. Today was the best possible day for me to rise long before dawn to take The Car to the repair shop and then walk home 2 miles in time to walk The Child another 2 miles to his school bus stop. Had this occurred last week, I'd probably be institutionalized by now.
So although my original intent was to present The Car as yet another "issue" that I have to deal with, actually, The Car is on my side. It's cheap, reliable, considerate and cute.
And if I really stretch my perception, there's a positive side to all of this. The job loss will create an unprecedented opportunity for adventure. My sister's illness provides reminder of the fleeting nature of life and the wisdom of living each day to the fullest. The court case takes the problems between father and son out of my hands. So far, the father's unreasonable behavior has resulted in no visitation rights, not even supervised, which makes The Child happy. If I really wanted to, I could refinance that 15-year mortgage to a 30-year with lower payments, but I choose to hold onto my current loan with its 4.5% interest rate.
And besides, I've always wondered what it would be like to work at Wal-Mart.....
Saturday, March 08, 2008
The blowing of the blizzard has added to the effect of the snow, creating impressive drifts.
My chances of traversing this driveway anytime soon (in my low-to-the-ground Honda Civic) are slim to none.
It would be easy to lose the dog in such massive snow. After a brief romp he was ready to retreat to his warm bed.
Monday, March 03, 2008
This was what my house looked like.
Today it's challenging to find any remaining snow or ice. I placed The Child's snowboard and saucer sled back in storage.
Most of the world outside of my house today looks like this- devoid of any hint of winter. I spied a chipmunk scurrying about, hopeful that his world was coming back to life. I imagine his legs were a bit stiff, but his speed belied that notion.